Besarion Tsintsadze

I am Besarion Tsintsadze, 32 years old, from Kutaisi. I have a five year old son named Gabriel. At first it seemed like Gabriel did not have any problems, but the concerns started when he began walking and crashing into the walls, chairs and everything in the room. At that time we took him to the doctor. By the time he was eighteen months old we knew he had Autism Spectrum Disorder.

Once Gabriel was diagnosed we returned home but without any information about what Autism meant or how it could be treated. No one explained anything to us, so we started investigating things ourselves on the internet. Of course this was very difficult. But even more stressful was finding out when we came back to Kutaisi that there were no services available for Gabriel. There was also a lot of talk and rumors about the cause of his diagnosis, whose genes it came from, and other nonsense.

Although it was a very difficult decision, we eventually had to leave our home town to move to Tbilisi in order to try to enroll Gabriel in a state program for Autistic children. We left our family, friends, house and jobs. I am an engineer by profession and had a good career and six years experience in an engineering company when I had to quit. Once in Tbilisi I spent the first two years in a "home prison" situation with Gabriel, as my wife had a new job and Gabriel was not yet admitted to the school. In the meantime, I completed training in the Autism field. For two years years we worked to get Gabriel in the state program and just a few months ago he was finally admitted. I started an internship at a day center. Through these years I learned a great deal in order to help my son. Now I am helping many other children who share the same problems. 

When I moved to Tbilisi I established a Facebook page for dads of children with Autism, and a lot of members joined the group. However, despite the membership numbers, there is very little activity from other fathers. They do not share their ideas, concerns or opinions on the page. It seems there are few fathers who are actively involved in the everyday lives of their children.

We have been trying to solve problems for three years already; it will be an endless process. But the most important thing is to change the mentality, that people know better than to call my son the result of "drug addicted parents," to make sure no one laughs at him and that he will be fully integrated into society.

To fathers I want to say this: it is not a shame that you have a child with a disability. Maybe your child cannot speak, but spend more time with him, get involved in her life and trust me-words are not necessary to understand what your child wants or needs.